Crabstravaganza 2026 Shareholders Cruise Ship Gala
The ocean has called.
The shareholders must answer.
Esteemed Shareholder,
You are cordially summoned aboard a luxury cruise liner* for an evening of fiduciary celebration, maritime excess, and shellfish-adjacent pageantry. Crabstravaganza 2026 is setting sail from West Seattle on April 9th.
Before and after the Gala, enjoy the full suite of cruise ship* amenities:
🛳 Lavish buffet dining and OPEN BAR
🛳 Lounging poolside upon sun-drenched decks
🛳 Entertaining entertainment
🛳Questionably legal gambling
🛳Slow dancing under the stars
🛳 The gentle psychological reset that only open water can provide*
The Crabstravaganza Gala is a one-night, black-tie (VERY OPTIONAL) affair, featuring formal revelry, ceremonial nonsense, and the reaffirmation of our shared values (abundance, indulgence, and crab).
Shareholders are warmly encouraged to invite additional investors, associates, or curious parties who wish to diversify their portfolio with high seas drama, and questionable corporate structures.
RSVP Early and trust the process
*this party will not actually take place on a boat.
Guest List
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